“My name is Cleopatra Hernandez el-Amad. I am 17. Years old. I did not kill my baby.”
I look at the paper the lady give me. I look at what I write on it. That what she wanted. That what I write. Is this okay I say.
She say no. She say I got more to write. Chinese police bitch. She say to write how I kill Wayne that I kill my baby. I call him Lil’ Wayne sometimes. I dress him up in little outfits and he so cute. I guess I ain’t dress him up no more. He dead. I don’t wanna cry but shit I feel cold. Cold deep in me. It don’t feel like it can be fix. Chinese bitch tap the pen in front of me.
Write 1 2 3 what you did she say to me. Stuck up cunt. She talk to me like a teacher.
I pick up that pen. I ask her how I supposed to write 1 2 3 like first this happen and then this happen. Like school. She say yeah so I ask her where they take my baby and she say that don’t matter right now and I say ok.
I tell Chinese bitch I love Lil’ Wayne. I didn’t hurt him. He crying all day and I can’t make him stop. I put beer in his bottle to calm him down but he won’t drink. I had to get away. So I go to the club. It make me look like a bad mother to write that.
So does a dead baby she say.
I feel real cold where my heart is. I think things be easier with my baby dead Maybe accidents ain’t so bad. So I write.
“Accident happen after I got home from the club. The Candy Shop on Laurel Street. My baby daddy Omar el-Amad he watch my baby while I go to the club. Omar do weed with my baby right there and my baby was stone and cry. My baby cry and cry and don’t stop. I put him on my bed to sleep and lay down next to him. I wake up. My baby dead. I get Omar and he call 911.”
I ask Chinese bitch if I accidental kill the baby do I go to jail and she say she don’t know. I think she know so I tell her god dam bitch tell me.
She say write more, she help me. She call me a smart girl. She don’t know me. But nobody ever call me smart so I write more. She still a bitch.
“Omar come in while me and my baby on that bed. Omar he want some. I drunk so I let him. I think I roll over on my baby while Omar on top of me but I drunk and my baby under me. I don’t feel him. I find him dead when I get up so I didn’t kill my baby it was a accident. Signed, Cleopatra Hernandez el-Amad”
I hand her this paper and she say good now follow me so I do. I get my fingerprints done and they take my picture so I guess I go to jail now. I don’t miss my baby because it won’t bring him back. I wonder when I can see Omar.